I'm not ready to have sex yet because I can't figure out how to tell you I have a penis.

I haven't stopped loving you one bit. My heart aches and all I can do is hope you love me the same and make "Us" happen again. I still believe you are the one.. and like Nat King Cole said, "When I give my heart, it will be forever"..I hate your new man for no other reason than he has you in his arms everynight..

i hate you so much for tearing me down everyday and doing the same to everyone else but i cant be mean to you

I have not slept with my wife for 8 years. I told her my equipment did not work any more. But it's really because her pussy is like the grand canyon and smells like a dead rat.

I want to scream at everyone, all the time, but instead I eat.