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I'm the reason your obese cat, Max, "ran away." He always came in my house, pissed on my furniture, and hissed at me. You never cared. He lives on a farm, now.
Rating:   32 Ups   31 Downs  
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I have beaten a polygraph.....
I did rob that store....
Rating:   35 Ups   38 Downs  
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Midgets are really creepy...they're ruining everything.
Rating:   33 Ups   38 Downs  
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I've peed in most ever public pool I've ever been in. I figure someone else beat me to it, so why bother holding it?
Rating:   21 Ups   28 Downs  
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Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing by asking you to move in. I'm still in love with someone else and your dog drives me insane.
Rating:   17 Ups   20 Downs  
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