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I'am so close to disappearing..or worse,leaving this world.I want you to take care of our daughter. I'm screaming inside and nobody hears.

I'am so close to disappearing..or worse,leaving this world.I want you to take care of our daughter. I'm screaming inside and nobody hears.

 
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Category: Secrets

 
You need a break, hell I need a break. I get tired of my child wanting to stay over by grandparents and god parents but it falls on deaf ears. One or two nights a year wouldn't be asking to much,or am I asking too much.
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god, i've felt like that..glad i talked to some one and got support.I remember that person,but its not me anymore.Yeah it took awhile....
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I sure can't hear you over the internet.
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We've all felt like that at some point. But that's the cowards easy way out! It's hard to keep going but you have to. Things change and you never know what is waiting for you in the future. Besides, do you really want to mess with your eternity? Just deal with what ever happens and keep going! Good things come to those who wait!
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your daughter hears u, whether you realize it or not... u need to be there for her or else her life will be full of tremendous pain, caused by u
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We all scream, for peace, and just to be left the hell alone. truth is yea alot of people never listen but the ones who REALLY care do. and people need you here. REALLY YOUR daughter does. don't make her suffer.
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^ it is possiable to be in that much pain that you just don't want to live!!!! i've been there myself wishing god would take me out of this world. befor this i couldn't understand such thinking so who ever you are maybe it's just possiable that someone could be in such dispair that they couldn't rationalize anything beyound the pain!? you yourself just haven't been that deep. i haven't been that deep but i never thought i'd be where i'm at today either so i'm not going to say it's not possiable to completley loose your mind from the pain and do such a thing with it having nothing to do with selfishness. i never thought i'd ever have thoughts about driving my truck over a cliff either but have.
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Thinking it and doing it are two different things. I have thought about it a lot but I also don't have 2 small children either. The person who takes their own life takes the easy way out and leaves all those behind to be in pain and grief. I call that selfish. Maybe they saw no other way out, but at least try to get help with counseling or meds or whatever. Reach out before you do something like that. Leave a wife wondering what she could have done for the rest of her life.
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^ i ageee but maybe they have reached out, i have and there isn't anything anyone can do to ease it. i just have to find my way through it. and you know maybe the difference between them, you and me is that we have god somewhere in our kaous, that does make a difference. if there were no god i'd have taken my life long ago. have a hard time finding purpose for my life. that earthquack that just hit hwiti reminds me of my own life, that poor country always struggling yet disaster after disaster keeps happening. makes me wonder if there are some that arn't sopposed to know anything else?? and at the same time it makes me greatful cause where i live those people would consider luxery. life is just hard all around, just wish for myself as well as the world it wasen't, too much pain in the world. some of us are stronger then others in some areas and then there are those who are stronger then you and i. the only one who realy knows how another feels and their frame of mind is god.
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I think it's sad when someone feels this is the only option for them, especially when they have young kids. I don't know what the answer is.
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^ yea me too.who does have an answer? if we knew the answer then it wouldn't be happening.
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^2 your a fool!!!!! depression doesn't take hold because you don't love yourself!!!!! and it's not self seeking punishment!!!!! it's quite clear you yourself have never been there. when something hurts inside with such intensity it comsumes you!! i'm a free spirited who nothing can get me down. i get upset then 5/10 min later i'm done morning it. i love to laugh and make others laugh, i'm genually happy even through life changing events, you cry let it out and then you smile. but i know all to well where this one is comming from. something happened in my life that i wasen't exspecting and it's ripped my heart out, a pain i've never known and it's so much stronger then anything i've ever known!! i'm not a week person but instead the oppisite strong beyond normal. i'm the one everyone else turns to for support and strength. noone can get me through this and time doesn't ease it but instead makes it that much more unbarable. i can't explain for you to understand without giving exact details but even if i did from your responce i'm sure you still would be clueless, most are!!ps: be very carful with your words when speaking, you can do more damage then good. you think your speaking wisdom but you have no exsperiance ( even if you have had some training in the feild, you can only assume)nor could you not in the way this person feels. none of us ever have the exact same exsperiances.
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Don't be self absorbed. Your child did not pick you or ask to be born unto you. You chose to be a parent, you chose a lifetime commitment. Don't f*** up another person like that.
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^ true maybe. maybe he was one of the men some vindictive b***h trapped into having a child. you know it does happen even when in a marriage. people are always trying to control what they want regardless of what the ther person wants. when you don't have all the facts it's not such a black n white answer. neither is depression!!
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7^ so you think someone who commits suicide does it out of selfishness??? NOONE WANTS TO END HIS OR HER LIFE!!!!!! anyone whos ever been there knows you haven't. i've never understood either untill it happened to me. i'm drowining now! and i'm the one who loves being happy and makes everyone else smile/laugh. and tries everything i know to brighten up those i know who arn't in very high spirits. not latley though, i can't pull myself out of this no matter how i try and the pain is far to much. i don't know how long i can go on like this. i just want it to stop hurting and it won't but instead grows with each passing day. i don't want to end my life. i don't want to live like this either. i'm no good to anyone. it doesn't help to talk about it. sometimes the pain inside is so intense that i break, eyes tearing regardless of where i'm at and it has nothing to do with what i'm thinkin., just something hurting deep inside. almost as if there is something inside thats broke and needs healing but that healng isn't comming. i have trouble making eye contact some days, afraid someone will see my pain and react as you, as though it's not that important and make light of it. that only causes it to hurt worse. you know when someone sees it even if they pretend they don't, it shows in their eyes. i'm the strong one, the one who every one else leans on but yet i can't help myself. it is very real though you have never been there.
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I HEAR YOU!! I MAY NOT KNOW YOU, BUT I HAER YOU!! I'M IN THIS WITH YOU, YOUR NOT ALONE. I'M SO SORRY I CAN'T STOP THAT PAIN FOR EITHER OF US! hang in there, something has to give something just has to.
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^^Maybe you should stop assuming you know every detail of every commenter's life on here. Yes, I do know what it's like. I deal with it every day. The meds don't help. Nothing really does. But I wouldn't leave my 2 young kids and traumatize them. And no matter how you rationalize it, suicide is selfish!
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Scream Louder Sweetheart but not only inside. Maybe someone will finally listen and help you through this hard time . Think of your little girl and how much she needs you !
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You're a hell of a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for...
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You have to reach out for help or people don't know what's going on with you. My next door neighbor shot himself in the head last year leaving his wife and 2 elementary-school-age kids behind. If he could only see what they have been through because of what he did. Selfish bast**d!
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Life isn't THAT bad, is it? Look at people who don't have half the life you do.
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That's because it's inside. Get help, people care. Love yourself, stop punishing yourself.
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Life does suck, at least your child loves you.
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Talk to your doctor. You deserve he help and telling a professional will lead you to find your voice and resources that you need to get through this rough time. Be well.
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go ahead take the cowards way , who knows what you will get on the other side of this life.
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Talk to your doctor. You deserve he help and telling a professional will lead you to find your voice and resources that you need to get through this rough time. Be well.
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I hear ya!!
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It's a hard knock life for us.
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Why bring a child into the world if you are not going to be there for them. Your child would rather have an imperfect you then not have you in their life.
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