Stop lying about it, it will help you heal.
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I miss my Dad too. But I have realized I miss what he should have been to me - a father worth looking up to. I don't miss who he is - a person who can't speak without lying.
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I wonder how old you are. I wonder if the reason he is gone is because of his own doing. I wonder if he were a good person or a less than good person, and perhaps your mother was good enough not to tell you all of the hurtful things he did when you were too young to remember. All she can do now is just sit quietly until he does something to hurt you, and then you can see for yourself his measure as a man.
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keep hope in your heart...i bet he is missing you...in his own way maybe...but you have to live your life and fill it with people who care and love you...
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Same here
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