Ouch
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I feel so bad for your poor wife...
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Just remember, the person you knew before may not be someone you would even like now. I've been there, I cried for three solid years and then he showed up ten years later, I was given another chance with him,he turned out to be someone I would never share my life with. You are lucky to have your loving wife, so don't go there.
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How sad for the woman you married. The person whom you first loved could never live up to the image of her you have created in your mind after all these years. But fantasy can make some days worth living.
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Thats just sad for both of you. Please make sure you never let that slip. Your wife, if she loves you, would be devastated! (If it ever does slip you better makes sure there are no guns in the house, she might hurt herself worse.)
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You should listen to the song Unanswered Prayers by Garth Brooks! It's natural to think of your first love but you should focus on your love for your wife instead of dreaming of your ex all the time. I'm sure the fantasies are better than the reality ever could be.
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I still think of my first love. It's been 29 years, I see him every now and them. Everytime I get in a sexual relationship I have to tell them about him. I still say his name in my sleep. I was married to someone else 14 years. I still called his name almost every night. Sad really I think.
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